That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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