So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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