At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
