I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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