She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
