I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
