think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
