Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
