You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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