we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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