I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
