Kiss
Puke
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
