That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Randomize
