you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
