if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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