Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Randomize
