They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
