She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
