Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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