Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
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