you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
We left an ass print on the piano.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
