feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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