Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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