Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
