Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
