The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
