Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
