you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
