I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize