i think i have herpe
just one?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
