Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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