That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
