i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
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