are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
