if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
