that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
