im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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