I accidentally had phone sex last night
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize
