Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize