I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
