Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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