she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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