i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
