Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Randomize
