It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
