he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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