We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
