Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
