We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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