I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
